All I Want for Christmas: Nothing from Amazon

This year has reinvigorated my commitment to two of my top goals: investing my money in small/local businesses and buying less. Like many of us, events from this year have reminded me that my money has impact and I want to be intentional about how I am using it to support the people and things that align with my values.

Now, I want to acknowledge that the ability to choose locally owned an small businesses is a privilege as items bought here are more expensive, but this also automatically serves my second goal: buying less. I am constantly overwhelmed and frustrated by the amount of things in our house and new items that make their way in at holidays and birthdays. As I consider the approaching holidays, I am intentionally planning how I want to shop. Knowing that includes shopping small, I know that price points will be higher, and instead of feeling like I have to buy the same amount and spend more money, I am welcoming the chance to practice buying less and choosing carefully what I think will be the most meaningful gift. If you are also trying to change your holiday shopping habits, or shopping habits in general, read on to find out how I'm approaching the challenge.

Plan early:

Online shopping has impacted my shopping habits more than I realized. I'm old enough to remember catalogs in the mail and brick and mortar stores being the only options. Meaning lots of driving around to various stores to find what you needed. It took planning and time. In 2025 I can order a random assortment of things: school curriculum, light bulbs, laundry detergent, and socks all from one website all from the convenience of my bed! No thought or planning necessary. When I started contemplating holiday shopping for this year, I realized that this habit was going to work against me if I didn't change my mindset. Which meant I needed to start thinking about a gift list early so I would have time to find everything in time.

Now, I'm definitely not a Christmas by November 1^st (or earlier!) person. In fact, when Christmas starts appearing in the store in October (big eye roll) I steer my kids in the opposite direction, reminding them that we're living in the season that is happening now. Hello Halloween! Thinking about Christmas gifts in mid October definitely felt out of step, but I wanted to have time to think intentionally and invest in meaningful gifts.

The Rule of Four:

Several years ago, I discovered the Rule of Four. While I haven't followed it exactly, it has given me a helpful framework when considering gifts, especially for my kids. This is my recommendation for anyone absorbing a new idea: take from it what works for you and leave the rest, or you'll just get overwhelmed.

The Rule of Four consists of four categories and the idea is to buy one gift for each category.

The challenge of coming up with something for each category is so fun, and it helps focus with intention even if you aren't strictly sticking to only four gifts. Even when I go beyond four gifts, the guidelines encourage me to choose less and think more.

Gifts of Experiences:

My favorite gifts, both to receive and give, are experiences. You know that feeling of excitement leading up to opening a present, and then almost immediately feeling a little deflated because the surprise is over? With an experience gift, the anticipation is extended! And its even better when the experience will be shared with the gift giver. If the intent behind gift given is to show someone we love them, what better way to show that than by spending intentional time together?

Experience gift options are endless: plan a trip with a partner. Gift someone lessons for something they've wanted to learn. Surprise someone with a shopping trip together. Take a friend to lunch, visit a museum. My kids have talked more about the time their uncle took them to the water park or train ride we went on than they do actually using many of the wrapped presents they receive. Not only do experience gifts last beyond the holiday itself, it is also the gift of memories made together or skills learned and carried into the future. Either way, the impact is intentional and meaningful while also reducing the excess of traditional gift-giving.

Research:

Okay, so the list is made and gift ideas are in place. Where do I find all these carefully chosen presents? When Amazon has everything you can possibly think of, I forgot where else I would have found these things before. My kids have both enjoyed learning archery this year, so I want to get them a bow and arrow set to practice with. With "the big A" out of the question, where do I begin looking? And then I remembered we have a locally owned outdoor store only 15 minutes from me!

Now I've made a list of three local stores where I can find most of my gifts. I also found an awesome website where I can buy books and the profits go to local bookstores! With a handful of other business online, I've created a shopping "map" that feels manageable and better aligned with my values. This process has actually made me feel more connected to the joy of gift giving and I am looking forward to going more analog this holiday season. It's re inspired some of the magic of the season for me. It is a return to a slower more intentional pace that my system is so craving. While it will take more of my time and energy, it is connecting me more fully in what I am purchasing and why, makes me appreciate the gifts I am giving as I've made more than a financial investment, and has made me think more intentionally about each person on my holiday list.

Changing habits is hard, especially in a culture when we are constantly fed ads telling us we more, fast and cheap. It takes energy and time, something most of us don't have, to remember we want to be more intentional with our purchases. But I’m learning to offer myself grace. I’m not doing this perfectly, and that’s okay. Real, lasting change takes time. And small steps, made consistently, are how we get there. So breathe. Take what resonates and leave the rest. Let this season reflect what matters most to you, and maybe that starts with fewer gifts, more connection, and purchases that truly align with your values.

Resources:

For gifts of experiences: FYA Gifts Cards for Sewing Lessons and Upcycle Club

For Read: Bookshop.org

For Want: Chickory Naturalist

For Wear: Winter Water Factory

For Need: Grove

No links are affiliate and I am not paid to promote any business or products.